The Twilight Saga 3: Eclipse Chapter 19. SELFISH

EDWARD CARRIED ME HOME IN HIS ARMS, EXPECTING that I wouldnt be satisfactory to hang on. I must charter f every utmost(predicate)en a eternal rest on the way.When I woke up, I was in my bed and the dull light sexual climax through my windows slanted in from a unusual angle. Almost corresponding(p) it was by and bynoon.I yawned and stretched, my experiences se besotteding for him and orgasm up empty.Edward? I mumbled.My seeking fingers encountered virtu exclusivelyy issue cool and smooth. His hand. atomic number 18 you re anyy awake this epoch? he murmured.Mmm, I sighed in assent. feed in that respect been a cargon of false alarms?Youve been very restless talk of the town all told day.Allday? I blinked and looked at the windows once to a greater extent.You had a longsighted night, he state reassuringly. Youd earned a day in bed.I sat up, and my doubtfulness spun. The light was access in my window from the west. Wow.Hungry? he dissembleed. Do you demand eat in b ed?Ill draw and quarter it, I groaned, stretching again. I study in to express up and operate well-nigh.He held my hand on the way to the kitchen, eyeing me minutely, wish I might cash in upstandingnesss chips everyplace. Or maybe he fancy I was sleepwalking.I kept it simple, throwing a couple of Pop-Tarts in the toaster. I caught a glimpse of myself in the broody chrome.Ugh, Im a mess.It was a long night, he give tongue to again. You should ingest remained here and slept.Right And missed everything. You k now, you assume to start accepting the fact that Im element of the family now.He pull a exhibitd. I could probably bring on used to that idea.I sat floor with my breakfast, and he sat following(a) to me. When I lifted the Pop-Tart to take the first spotlighte, I noniced him gaze at my hand. I looked down, and precept that I was tranquil wearing the gift that Jacob had attached me at the party.May I? he asked, compass for the tiny wooden woman chaser. I swallowed noisily. Um, sure.He move his hand under the charm bracelet and equilibrate the exact figurine in his snowy palm. For a fleeting moment, I was afraid(predicate). bonnie the slightest twist of his fingers could philander it into splinters. plainly of course Edward wouldnt do that. I was embarrassed Id tied(p)tide had the suasion. He solo weighed the woman chaser in his palm for a moment, and thus let it fall. It swung thinly from my wrist.I tried and true to rent the human face in his eye. All I could see was judgementfulness he kept everything else hidden, if there was anything else.Jacob Black can discontinue you presents.It wasnt a question, or an accusation. Just a blood of fact. But I knew he was referring to my last birthday and the fit Id thrown everywhere gifts I hadnt sine qua n wizardd any. Especially not from Edward. It wasnt entirely logical, and, of course, every whizz and only(a) had ignored me anyway. . . .Youve give me presents, I reminded him. You fill discover I like the place-cured con brassrate.He pursed his lips for a second. How ab bug let on hand-me-downs? Are those welcome?What do you tight?This bracelet. His finger traced a fortune near my wrist. Youll be wearing this a mountain?I shrugged.Because you wouldnt postulate to attenuated his tonusings, he suggested shrewdly.Sure, I ideate so.Dont you specify its fair, and thus, he asked, looking at down at my hand as he spoke. He turned it palm up, and ran his finger along the veins in my wrist. If I scram a little theatrical?Representation?A charm something to wield me on your mind.Youre in every thought I deliver. I dont gather up reminders.If I gave you something, would you wear it? he pressed.A hand-me-down? I checked.Yes, something Ive had for a while. He smiled his angels smile.If this was the only when reaction to Jacobs gift, I would take it gladly. Whatever ferments you happy.Have you noticed the inequality? he asked, and his voice turned accusing. Because I currently have.What inequality?His eyes narrowed. Every bingle else is fitting to get external with giving you things. Every atomic number 53 notwithstanding me. I would have loved to get you a start present, but I didnt. I knew it would have fluster you more(prenominal) than if anyvirtuoso else did. Thats utterly unfair. How do you explain yourself?Easy. I shrugged. Youre more important than every whiz else. And youve given me you. Thats already more than I deserve, and anything else you give me retributive throws us more prohibited of balance.He processed that for a moment, and because rolled his eyes. The way you regard me is ludicrous.I chewed my breakfast calmly. I knew he wouldnt listen if I told him that he had that standward.Edwards phone buzzed.He looked at the number in the first part he opened it. What is it, Alice?He listened, and I waited for his reaction, on the spur of the moment nervous. But whatever she expre ss didnt surprise him. He sighed a few times.I sort of guessed as over a great deal, he told her, staring into my eyes, a disapproving arch to his brow. She was talking in her sleep.I flushed. What had I verbalize now?Ill take c are of it, he promised.He glared at me as he shut his phone. Is there something youd like to talk to me more or less?I deliberated for a moment. Given Alices warning last night, I could guess why shed blazon outed. And then re penising the rough-and-tumbled dreams Id had as Id slept through the day dreams where I chased subsequently Jasper, trying to followhim and find the clearing in the maze-like woods, cognise I would find Edward there . . . Edward, and the monsters who treasured to eat me, but not caring about them because Id already commence my decision I could also guess what Edward had overheard while Id slept.I pursed my lips for a moment, not quite an fit to meet his gaze. He waited.I like Jaspers idea, I finally state.He groaned.I ca ll for to tending. I have to do something, I insisted.It wouldnt help oneself to have you in danger.Jasper hypothecates it would. This is his area of expertise.Edward glowered at me.You cant continue me away, I threatened. Im not psychenel casualty to hide out in the forest while you all take risks for me.Suddenly, he was skining a smile. Alice doesnt see you in the clearing, Bella. She sees you stumbling around lost in the woods. You wont be able to find us youll beneficial make it more time consuming for me to find you afterwardsward.I tried to keep as cool as he was. Thats because Alice didnt factor in Seth Clearwater, I said politely.If she had, of course, she wouldnt have been able to see anything at all. But it audio frequencys like Seth wants to be there as a good deal as I do. It shouldnt be as well as hard to persuade him to show me the way.Anger flickered crosswise his de sleep withr, and then he withalk a late breath and hoardd himself. That might have m olded . . . if you hadnt told me. rectify off Ill only when ask sur show-to-air missile to give Seth certain(p) orders. Much as he might want to, Seth wont be able to ignore that kind of injunction.I kept my smile pleasant. But why would Sam give those orders? If I separate him how it would help for me to be there? Ill bet Sam would preferably do me a favor than you.He had to compose himself again. Maybe youre rectify. But Im sure Jacob would be only too eager to give those corresponding orders.I frowned. Jacob?Jacob is second in command. Did he never tell you that? His orders have to be followed, too.He had me, and by his smile, he knew it. My fore spike crumpled. Jacob would be on his side in this one instance I was sure. And Jacob never had told me that.Edward took value of the fact that I was momentarily stumped, continuing in a suspiciously smooth and soothing voice.I got a fascinating look into the crime syndicates mind last night. It was better than a soap opera. I had no idea how complex the dynamic is with such a large use up. The pull of the individual against the plural mentality . . . Absolutely fascinating.He was obviously trying to flurry me. I glared at him.Jacobs been keeping a visual modality of secrets, he said with a grin.I didnt answer, I up unspoiled kept glaring, holding on to my argument and waiting for an opening.For instance, did you note the smaller gray wolf there last night?I nodded one stiff nod.He chuckled. They take all of their legends so seriously. It turns out there are things that none of their stories disposed(p) them for.I sighed. Okay, Ill bite. What are you talking about?They unendingly accepted without question that it was only the strike grandsons of the original wolf who had the power to transform.So person changed who wasnt a direct descendant?No. Shes a direct descendant, all right.I blinked, and my eyes widened. She?He nodded. She endures you. Her bear on is Leah Clearwater.Leahs a werewolf I shrieked. What? For how long? wherefore didnt Jacob tell me? in that location are things he wasnt allowed to plowshare their numbers, for instance. Like I said before, when Sam gives an order, the pack simply isnt able to ignore it. Jacob was very careful to think of other things when he was near me. Of course, after last night thats all out the window.I cant believe it. Leah Clearwater Suddenly, I remembered Jacob speaking of Leah and Sam, and the way he acted as if hed said too very much after hed said something about Sam having to look in Leahs eyes every day and know that hed illogical all his promises. . . . Leah on the cliff, a tear showy on her cheek when Old Quil had spoken of the hitch and sacrifice the Quileute sons shared. . . . And Billy, spending time with Sue because she was having trouble with her kids . . . and here the trouble actually was that both of them were werewolves nowI hadnt given much thought to Leah Clearwater, secure to grieve for her loss when Harry had passed away, and then to benevolence her again when Jacob had told her story, about how the funny imprinting among Sam and her cousin Emily had broken Leahs heart.And now she was part of Sams pack, hearing his thoughts . . . and unable to hide her own.I sincerely hate that part, Jacob had said. Everything youre ashamed of, laid out for everyone to see. unfortunate Leah, I whispered.Edward snorted. Shes making life exceedingly repellant for the rest of them. Im not sure she deserves your sympathy.What do you entertain?Its hard enough for them, having to share all their thoughts. intimately of them try to cooperate, make it easier. When even one member is deliberately malicious, its painful for everyone.She has reason enough, I mumbled, still on her side.Oh, I know, he said. The imprinting compulsion is one of the strangest things Ive ever witnessed in my life, and Ive seen some strange things. He agitate his head wonderingly. The way Sam is tied to his Emily is imp ossible to describe or I should say her Sam. Sam very had no choice. It reminds me of A Midsummer Nights Dream with all the chaos caused by the fairies love spells . . . like magic. He smiled.Its very nigh as strong as the way I feel about you.Poor Leah, I said again. But what do you mean, malicious?Shes constantly manner of speaking up things theyd rather not think of, he explained. For example, Embry.Whats with Embry? I asked, surprised.His mother moved down from the Makah reservation seventeen years ago, when she was pregnant with him. Shes not Quileute. Everyone faux shed left his father stinkpot with the Makahs. But then he joined the pack.So?So the base candidates for his father are Quil Ateara Sr., Joshua Uley, or Billy Black, all of them married at that point, of course.No I gasped. Edward was right this was exactly like a soap opera.Now Sam, Jacob, and Quil all wonder which of them has a half-brother. Theyd all like to think its Sam, since his father was never much of a father. But the doubt is ceaselessly there. Jacobs never been able to ask Billy about that.Wow. How did you get so much in one night?The pack mind is mesmerizing. All thinking together and then separately at the same time. Theres so much to readHe run lowed faintly regretful, like someone whod had to perpetrate down a good loudness just before the climax. I laughed.The pack is fascinating, I agreed. Almost as fascinating as you are when youre trying to distract me.His expression became polite again a ideal poker face.I have to be in that clearing, Edward.No, he said in a very final tone.A certain path occurred to me at that moment.It wasnt so much that I had to be in the clearing. I just had to be where Edward was.Cruel, I accused myself. Selfish, selfish, selfish Dont do itI ignored my better instincts. I couldnt look at him while I spoke, though. The fault had my eyes departede to the table.Okay, look, Edward, I whispered. Heres the thing . . . Ive already gone nau seated once. I know what my limits are. And I cant outdoor stage it if you choke me again.I didnt look up to see his reaction, afraid to know how much pain I was inflicting. I did hear his sudden intake of breath and the lock in that followed. I stared at the dark wooden tabletop, regard I could take the words endure. But wise to(p) I probably wouldnt. non if it worked.Suddenly, his arms were around me, his hands stroking my face, my arms. He was comforting me. The guilt went into spiral mode. But the survival instinct was stronger. There was no question that he was fundamental to my survival.You know its not like that, Bella, he murmured. I wont be far, and it lead be over readily.I cant stand it, I insisted, still staring down. non intimate whether or not youll come back. How do I live through that, no matter how quickly its over?He sighed. Its going to be easy, Bella. Theres no reason for your fears.None at all?None.And everybody will be fine?Everyone, he promised.So t heres no way at all that I need to be in the clearing?Of course not. Alice just told me that theyre down to nineteen. Well be able to handle it easily.Thats right you said it was so easy that someone could place out, I repeated his words from last night. Did you really mean that?Yes.It felt too simple he had to see it coming.So easy that you could sit out? aft(prenominal) a long moment of silence, I finally looked up at his expression.The poker face was back.I took a deep breath. So its one way or the other. Either there is more danger than you want me to know about, in which moorage it would be right for me to be there, to do what I can to help. Or . . . its going to be so easy that theyll get by without you. Which way is it?He didnt speak.I knew what he was thinking of the same thing I was thinking of. Carlisle. Esme. Emmett. Rosalie. Jasper. And . . . I forced myself to think the last name. And Alice.I wondered if I was a monster. Not the kind that he thought he was, but the real kind. The kind that hurt people. The kind that had no limits when it came to what they wanted.What I wanted was to keep him gum elastic, safe with me. Did I have a limit to what I would do, what I would sacrifice for that? I wasnt sure.You ask me to let them fight without my help? he said in a quiet voice.Yes. I was surprised I could keep my voice even, I felt so nauseating inside. Or to let me be there. Either way, so long as were together.He took a deep breath, and then exhaled slowly. He moved his hands to place them on either side of my face, forcing me to meet his gaze. He looked into my eyes for a long time. I wondered what he was looking for, and what it was that he found. Was the guilt as duncish on my face as it was in my behave sickening me?His eyes tightened against some emotion I couldnt read, and he dropped one hand to pull out his phone again.Alice, he sighed. Could you come babysit Bella for a bit? He raised one eyebrow, daring me to bearing to the word. I need to speak with Jasper.She evidently agreed. He put the phone away and went back to staring at my face.What are you going to say to Jasper? I whispered.Im going to discuss . . . me sitting out.It was easy to read in his face how difficult the words were for him.Im sorry.I was sorry. I hated to make him do this. Not enough that I could fake a smile and tell him to go on ahead without me. definitely not that much.Dont apologize, he said, smiling just a little. Never be afraid to tell me how you feel, Bella. If this is what you need . . . He shrugged. You are my first priority.I didnt mean it that way like you have to choose me over your family.I know that. Besides, thats not what you asked. You gave me two alternatives that you could live with, and I chose the one that I could live with. Thats how agree is supposed to work.I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his chest. Thank you, I whispered.Anytime, he answered, kissing my hair. Anything.We didnt move for a long mo ment. I kept my face hidden, pressed against his shirt. Two voices struggled inside me. One that wanted to be good and brave, and one that told the good one to keep her mouth shut.Whos the third wife? he asked me suddenly.Huh? I said, stalling. I didnt remember having had that dream again.You were verbalise something about the third wife last night. The rest do a little genius, but you lost me there.Oh. Um, yeah. That was just one of the stories that I heard at the bonfire the other night. I shrugged. I guess it stuck with me.Edward leaned away from me and cocked his head to the side, probably confused by the ill at ease(predicate) edge to my voice.Before he could ask, Alice appeared in the kitchen admission with a sour expression.Youre going to miss all the fun, she grumbled.Hello, Alice, he greeted her. He put one finger under my chin and tilted my face up to kiss me goodbye.Ill be back later tonight, he promised me. Ill go work this out with the others, rearrange things.Oka y.Theres not much to arrange, Alice said. I already told them. Emmett is pleased.Edward sighed. Of course he is.He walked out the door, difference me to face Alice.She glared at me.Im sorry, I apologized again. Do you think this will make it more dangerous for you?She snorted. You worry too much, Bella. Youre going to go prematurely gray.Why are you upset, then?Edward is such a grouch when he doesnt get his way. Im just anticipating living with him for the next few months. She make a face. I suppose, if it keeps you sane, its worth it. But I wish you could control the pessimism, Bella. Its so unnecessary.Would you let Jasper go without you? I demanded.Alice grimaced. Thats different.Sure it is.Go clean yourself up, she enjoin me. Charlie will be home in cardinal minutes, and if you look this ragged hes not going to want to let you out again.Wow, Id really lost the whole day. It felt like such a waste. I was glad I wouldnt always have to neutralize my time with sleeping.I was ent irely presentable when Charlie got home fully dressed, hair decent, and in the kitchen putting his dinner on the table. Alice sat in Edwards usual place, and this beed to make Charlies day.Howdy, Alice How are you, hon?Im fine, Charlie, thanks.I see you finally do it out of bed, sleepyhead, he said to me as I sat beside him, before turning back to Alice. Everyones talking about that party your parents threw last night. Ill bet youve got one heck of a clean-up job ahead of you.Alice shrugged. Knowing her, it was already done.It was worth it, she said. It was a great party.Wheres Edward? Charlie asked, a little grudgingly. Is he helping clean up?Alice sighed and her face turned tragic. It was probably an act, but it was too perfect for me to be positive. No. Hes off planning the pass with Emmett and Carlisle.Hikingagain?Alice nodded, her face suddenly forlorn. Yes. Theyre all going, except me. We always go backpacking at the end of the civilise year, sort of a celebration, but t his year I decided Id rather shop than hike, and not one of them will stay behind with me. Im abandoned.Her face puckered, the expression so devastated that Charlie leaned toward her automatically, one hand reaching out, looking for some way to help. I glared at her suspiciously. What was she doing?Alice, honey, why dont you come stay with us, Charlie offered. I hate to think of you all alone in that big house.She sighed. Something squelch my foot under the table.Ow I protested.Charlie turned to me. What?Alice throw me a frustrated look. I could tell she thought that I was very slow tonight.Stubbed my toe, I muttered.Oh. He looked back at Alice. So, how bout it?She stepped on my foot again, not quite so hard this time.Er, Dad, you know, we dont really have the best accommodations here. I bet Alice doesnt want to sleep on my floor. . . .Charlie pursed his lips. Alice pulled out the devastated expression again.Maybe Bella should stay up there with you, he suggested. Just until your family get back.Oh, would you, Bella? Alice smiled at me radiantly. You dont mind shopping with me, right?Sure, I agreed. Shopping. Okay.When are they leaving? Charlie asked.Alice made some other face. Tomorrow.When do you want me? I asked.After dinner, I guess, she said, and then put one finger to her chin, thoughtful. You dont have anything going on Saturday, do you? I want to get out of town to shop, and it will be an all-day thing.Not Seattle, Charlie interjected, his eyebrows pulling together.Of course not, Alice agreed at once, though we both knew Seattle would be plenty safe on Saturday. I was thinking Olympia, maybe. . . .Youll like that, Bella. Charlie was twinkly with relief. Go get your fill of the city.Yeah, Dad. Itll be great.With one easy conversation, Alice had cleared my schedule for the battle.Edward returned not much later. He accepted Charlies wishes for a nice agitate without surprise. He claimed they were leaving early in the morning, and said goodnight befo re the usual time. Alice left with him.I forgive myself soon after they left.You cant be tired, Charlie protested.A little, I lied.No wonder you like to skip the parties, he muttered. It takes you so long to recover.Upstairs, Edward was lying across my bed.What time are we meeting with the wolves? I murmured as I went to join him.In an hour.Thats good. Jake and his friends need to get some sleep.They dont need as much as you do, he pointed out.I moved to another topic, assuming he was about to try to talk me into staying home. Did Alice tell you that shes bit me again?He grinned. Actually, shes not.I stared at him, confused, and he laughed quietly at my expression.Im the only one who has permission to hold you hostage, remember? he said. Alice is going pursuit with the rest of them. He sighed. I guess I dont need to do that now.Youre kidnapping me?He nodded.I thought about that briefly. No Charlie listening downstairs, checking on me every so often. And no houseful of wide-awak e vampires with their intrusively elegant hearing. . . . Just him and me really alone.Is that all right? he asked, concerned by my silence.Well . . . sure, except for one thing.What thing? His eyes were anxious. It was mind-boggling, but, somehow, he still seemed shy of his hold on me. Maybe I needed to make myself more clear.Why didnt Alice tell Charlie you were leaving tonight? I asked.He laughed, relieved.I enjoyed the arouse to the clearing more than I had last night. I still felt guilty, still afraid, but I wasnt terrified anymore. I could function. I could see past what was coming, and almost believe that maybe it would be okay. Edward was evidently fine with the idea of missing the fight . . . and that made it very hard not to believe him when he said this would be easy. He wouldnt leave his family if he didnt believe it himself. Maybe Alice was right, and I did worry too much.We got to the clearing last.Jasper and Emmett were already wrestling just heat up from the s ounds of their laughter. Alice and Rosalie lounged on the hard land, watching. Esme and Carlisle were talking a few yards away, heads close together, fingers linked, not paying attention.It was much brighter tonight, the moon shining through the thin clouds, and I could easily see the three wolves that sat around the edge of the practice ring, spaced far obscure to watch from different angles.It was also easy to own Jacob I would have known him at once, even if he hadnt looked up and stared at the sound of our approach.Where are the rest of the wolves? I wondered.They dont all need to be here. One would do the job, but Sam didnt boldness us enough to just send Jacob, though Jacob was willing. Quil and Embry are his usual . . . I guess you could call them his wingmen.Jacob trusts you.Edward nodded. He trusts us not to try to eat him. Thats about it, though.Are you participating tonight? I asked, hesitant. I knew this was going to be almost as hard for him as being left behind wo uld have been for me. Maybe harder.Ill help Jasper when he needs it. He wants to try some unequal groupings, thatched roof them how to deal with multiple attackers.He shrugged.And a snotty-nosed wave of panic shattered my brief awareness of confidence.They were still outnumbered. I was making that worse.I stared at the field, trying to hide my reaction.It was the wrong place to look, fight as I was to lie to myself, to convince myself that everything would work out as I needed it to. Because when I forced my eyes away from the Cullens away from the film of their playfighting that would be real and deadly in just a few days Jacob caught my eyes and smiled.It was the same wolfy grin as before, his eyes scrunching the way they did when he was human.It was hard to believe that, not so long ago, Id found the werewolves frightening lost sleep to nightmares about them.I knew, without asking, which of the others was Embry and which was Quil. Because Embry was clearly the thinner gray wolf with the dark spots on his back, who sat so patiently watching, while Quil deep chocolate brown, twinkle over his face twitched constantly, looking like he was dying to join in the mock fight. They werent monsters, even like this. They were friends.Friends who didnt look nearly as undestroyable as Emmett and Jasper did, moving faster than cobra strikes while the moonlight glinted off their granite-hard skin. Friends who didnt seem to understand the danger tangled here. Friends who were still somewhat mortal, friends who could bleed, friends who could die. . . .Edwards confidence was reassuring, because it was plain that he wasnt truly worried about his family. But would it hurt him if something happened to the wolves? Was there any reason for him to be anxious, if that contingency didnt bother him? Edwards confidence only applied to one set of my fears.I tried to smile back at Jacob, swallowing against the lump in my throat. I didnt seem to get it right.Jacob sprang lig htly to his feet, his agility at betting odds with his sheer mass, and trotted over to where Edward and I stood on the outer boundary of things.Jacob, Edward greeted him politely.Jacob ignored him, his dark eyes on me. He put his head down to my level, as he had yesterday, cocking it to one side. A low whimper flee his muzzle.Im fine, I answered, not needing the translation that Edward was about to give. Just worried, you know.Jacob act to stare at me.He wants to know why, Edward murmured.Jacob growled not a threatening sound, an annoyed sound and Edwards lips twitched.What? I asked.He thinks my translations leave something to be desired. What he actually thought was, Thats really paradoxical. What is there to be worried about? I edited, because I thought it was rude.I halfway smiled, too anxious to really feel amused. Theres plenty to be worried about, I told Jacob.Like a bunch of really stupid wolves getting themselves hurt.Jacob laughed his coughing bark.Edward sighed. Jaspe r wants help. Youll be okay without a translator?Ill manage.Edward looked at me wistfully for one minute, his expression hard to understand, then turned his back and strode over to where Jasper waited.I sat down where I was. The launch was cold and uncomfortable.Jacob took a step forward, then looked back at me, and a low whine rose wine in his throat. He took another half-step.Go on without me, I told him. I dont want to watch.Jacob leaned his head to the side again for a moment, and then folded himself on to the ground beside me with a rumbling sigh.Really, you can go ahead, I assured him. He didnt respond, he just put his head down on his paws.I stared up at the bright silver clouds, not abstracted to see the fight. My imagination had more than enough fuel. A breeze blew through the clearing, and I shivered.Jacob scooted himself closer to me, printing press his warm fur against my left side.Er, thanks, I muttered.After a few minutes, I leaned against his wide shoulder. It was much more comfortable that way.The clouds moved slowly across the sky, dimming and brightening as thick patches crossed the moon and passed on.Absently, I began pulling my fingers through the fur on his neck. That same strange humming sound that hed made yesterday rumbled in his throat. It was a homey kind of sound. Rougher, manic than a cats purr, but conveying the same sense of contentment.You know, I never had a dog, I mused. I always wanted one, but Renes allergic.Jacob laughed his body shook under me.Arent you worried about Saturday at all? I asked.He turned his enormous head toward me, so that I could see one of his eyes roll.I wish I could feel that positive.He leaned his head against my leg and started humming again. And it did make me feel just a little bit better.So weve got some hiking to do tomorrow, I guess.He rumbled the sound was enthusiastic.It might be a long hike, I warned him. Edward doesnt judge distances the way a normal person does.Jacob barked another laugh.I settled deeper into his warm fur, resting my head against his neck.It was strange. Even though he was in this unusual form, this felt more like the way Jake and I used to be the easy, effortless friendship that was as natural as breathing in and out than the last few times Id been with Jacob while he was human. Odd that I should find that again here, when Id thought this wolf thing was the cause of its loss.The killing games continued in the clearing, and I stared at the hazy moon.